


When You're All That's Left

by Peace Love and Frerard



Category: Umbrella Academy
Genre: Hurt-Comfort, Romance
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2011-06-20
Updated: 2011-09-07
Packaged: 2015-02-25 23:22:30
Rating: M
Chapters: 15
Words: 10,821
Publisher: www.fanfiction.net
Story URL: https://www.fanfiction.net/s/7100875/1/
Author URL: https://www.fanfiction.net/u/2953102/Peace-Love-and-Frerard
Summary: Teenage Frerard. Read to find out what it's about.





	1. Chapter 1

I reluctantly opened the front door of my house.

"FRANK!" my dad shouted as I shut the door.

"Yeah?" I sighed.

"WHERE THE FUCK HAVE YOU BEEN?" he demanded, appearing at the top of the stairs.

"Just… out." I muttered.

"Who were you with?"

"No one. I just went for a walk."

"Oh yes, I forgot you didn't have any friends. And it's not like you'd want to be out with a girl, is it?"

"Why wouldn't I wanna be out with a girl?" I sighed.

"You don't exactly keep the fact that your gay quiet, do you?" he laughed at me. I cast my eyes down.

"For the last time, I'm bi." I almost whispered.

"Stop kidding yourself princess."

"Fuck off." I kicked my shoes at the wall angrily and went upstairs, pushing past him.

"Don't forget you're going to your mum's in a minute."

I slammed my door. Brilliant, another weekend with my mum and step-dad. At least I'd be away from my dad, but it came at the cost of being hit and ridiculed by Andy, my step-brother, whenever no one was around. I half-heartedly threw some clothes into a rucksack and dragged my feet across to my desk, searching through the mess. Something cold, sharp and metal came into contact with my finger, cutting it slightly. I secured my fingers around it and retrieved it from under a few empty beer cans. I looked at the cut on my finger; it wasn't deep. I positioned the razor blade just above my wrist and brought it down, cutting it into the skin, tracing across an old scar that still hadn't healed. Blood trickled slowly down my arm. I jumped as the door opened. I tugged my sleeve down and dropped the blade, turning round to see my dad frowning at me.

"Your mum's here."

I nodded, grabbed my bag and went downstairs. The blood was trickling into my hand and I clenched it into a fist and put it behind my back as I opened the front door and went out to my mum's car. I got in the back, avoiding eye contact with her.

"Hi Frank, you alright?" she said.

"Yeah." I said, shrugging.

"You had a good week?" she asked as my little brother Jason got into the car.

"Well, it was a week at school…" I sighed. I wasn't going to go into reasons why school was living hell for me. Mainly, it was the people there. They all called me gay and various other nicknames similar to the distasteful ones my dad often spat at me. I also had no friends, everyone steered clear of me, even the outsiders. Basically, I'd been outcast by the outcasts. I spent my lunchtimes sitting behind the bike sheds, hoping no one would find me. One of the worst parts was, the most popular kid in school was my step-brother, and he was the sort of 'leader' of everyone who hated me.

Mum gave up on the conversation, realising I didn't want to talk and talking to Jason instead. We got to her house and I sighed as I stepped out of the car and followed her up the front path to the door.


	2. Chapter 2

"Mark? We're back!" my mother almost sang in an irritatingly cheerful voice. I went straight upstairs, chucking my bag through the open door of the spare room on the way to the bathroom, examining the cut on my wrist and my blood-soaked hand. Andy suddenly stepped out in front of me. He smirked, seeing the blood.

"Who'd you kill, psycho?"

I pushed past him into the bathroom and locked the door, immediately turning my attention to getting the blood off. When I'd succeeded and left the bathroom, I saw Andy was still standing outside.

"Been cutting yourself again?" I tried to ignore him but he grabbed the back of my collar and pulled me back. "Well?" I nodded meekly. He punched me in the stomach. "You need help." he muttered as he walked away. I stumbled into the spare room and fell onto the bed, picking up a book off the bedside table and throwing it at the door. I took off my hoodie as the sleeve was covered in blood, and sat back down on the bed, putting my iPod on and closing my eyes.

The next thing I knew my headphones were being painfully pulled out of my ears by Andy. "Dinner's ready, fag." he said before walking out of the room with my iPod. "What is this shit?" he laughed, looking through the music on there.

"Give it back!" I said, grabbing the cord of the headphones and pulling, only succeeding in yanking the headphones out. "For fuck's sake!" I yelled, kicking his leg. It can't have hurt much, as I'm the worst person at fighting back, but my mum appeared at the foot of the stairs just then.

"OW! FRANK!" Andy yelled, clutching at his leg in 'pain'.

"Frank, what are you doing?" said my mum. I ignored her and headed into the dining room, grabbing my iPod out of his hands.

"So Frank, how's your wrist?" said Andy when we were all sat around the table. I froze, staring at him. My mum and Mark looked at me.

"What happened to your wrist?" said mum. I shook my head.

"Oh, it's nothing, I just hurt it at school."

"Really? You told me you slit your wrist?"

My mum stared at me. "What?"

"No, I was… joking."

"He wasn't! Look!" exclaimed Andy, enjoying the reactions from my mum and step-dad as he grabbed my arm, revealing the still fresh cut. There was a silence around the table.

"Frank, why did you…?"

"Fucking hell, will you just leave me alone!" I yelled, putting my head in my hands. There was a slight silence as I blinked back tears. Suddenly Andy piped up again.

"Did you know he's gay too?"

I could've screamed. "SHUT UP!" I yelled at him.

Mum and Mark were staring at me. "Are you?" Jason said.

"NO!" I stood up and sprinted upstairs into the spare room, slamming the door with as much force as I could.


	3. Chapter 3

Somehow, no one took the hint that I wanted them to leave me alone. The next day my mum came into the room, pottering around and picking some rubbish up off the floor as she spoke to me.

"Andy's going to a party tonight with some friends from school, and I think it'd be quite nice if you went with him. You look like you could use some cheering up." She looked up to see I was smoking and frowned.

"No thanks." I muttered, staring at the ceiling. I knew he would humiliate me. I didn't like social events anyway.

"Oh come on, Frank. He's offered, and I think you ought to get out more. It's about time you made some friends, and I told you to stop smoking in the house."

"I don't think you understood. I'm _not_ going."

A few hours later, I was being practically forced out of the house by my mum. How did she not realise Andy was just doing this to annoy me? By the time we got to the party I had come up with the plan of going in but leaving as soon as Andy was out of sight, but Andy had other ideas. He dragged me over to his friends, who all stared at me as we approached.

"What's he doing here?" said one of them in disgust. I recognised him from school; he had shoved me into lockers several times this year.

"He's my special guest." They all laughed as they understood his reasoning for me being here, and all quickly stepped up to the role of taking the piss.

"Aren't you gay?" one of them said loudly so several people around heard him and looked round.

"No." I said firmly, not looking at him, just staring at the floor. After a few minutes some more people joined the gathering, including some older guys. This was quickly turning into my worst nightmare.

"You ever fucked a guy?" said someone, receiving a ripple of laughter.

"No."

"Ever fucked a girl?" someone else added. My heart sank.

"Yeah…" I lied.

"Who?"

I looked desperately around.

"No he hasn't." said Andy. I went bright red. "He hasn't even kissed anyone before."

"I'm not surprised." said one of the older guys there. Everyone burst out laughing. Tears pricked the corners of my eyes and I turned round, heading out of the house.

"Oi faggot! Where d'you think you're going?" Andy grabbed my arm, pulling me back. I turned round to him and punched him in the face before running, tears streaming down my face. I stopped half way down the road, falling to my knees and sobbing.


	4. Chapter 4

"Uh… are you alright?" said a voice. My head jerked upwards to see a guy standing in front of me. I shook my head slightly. He held out a hand and I took it as he helped me up. He had jet black hair that was long and messy, and hazel eyes, surrounded by a thick layer of eyeliner, as mine were, and was wearing a Misfits t-shirt, skinny jeans and converses. He looked a couple of years older than me. "What's up?" he said comfortingly. I continued to cry and he pulled me into a hug. I sobbed onto his shoulder. He was a complete stranger but he seemed nice, like he cared, unlike everyone else.

After a few minutes, he put a finger under my chin and titled my head up to look at him.

"What is it?" he said quietly.

"Everything. I hate my life."

"Aw, c'mon, it can't be everything. Is it your family, friends, stuff at school…?"

"That's exactly what's wrong. My dad hates me, my mum doesn't care about me, my step brother makes everything hell while I'm at my mum's, I have no friends, and I get beaten up every day at school. Oh, and now everyone knows I'm a virgin." I realised just after I said this that I was talking to a complete stranger and blushed slightly. He didn't seem fazed.

"I know I don't even know you, but if you wanna get it all out you can tell me."

I shrugged.

"It helps to let it out. I'm speaking from experience."

I thought for a moment then slowly nodded. He began to walk in the direction I'd come from.

"Where are you going?" I said.

"Unless you wanna vent in the middle of the street, we're going to mine." he said, grabbing my sleeve and pulling me with him. We walked along a little way, then he slipped his hand into mine. I smiled slightly. "What's your name, by the way?"

"Frank."

"I'm Gerard."

I nodded. I looked to my left to see we were passing the party I had just come from. My heart sank as I saw Andy and his friends were in the front garden, smoking. I looked down at the pavement, hoping they wouldn't notice me.

"Gays!" someone yelled at us. I groaned. Gerard stopped, glaring at them.

"Hey Andy! Guess who's got himself a boyfriend?" Andy looked over at us and began laughing. I pulled my hand out of Gerard's.

"I HAVEN'T GOT A FUCKING BOYFRIEND!" I shouted. Gerard started towards them but I grabbed his arm and pulled him along the street.

"Your mum's gonna hear about this Frank!" Andy laughed. When we got a little way along the road, Gerard turned to me.

"How could you just let them say that stuff?" he demanded. I closed my eyes.

"You get used to it." I sighed, walking on. He caught up with me and intertwined our fingers again as we continued.


	5. Chapter 5

His house was pretty big. There was one beaten-up, second hand car in the large drive that could easily fit three, but no sign of inhabitants inside the house.

"Where are your parents?" I said, taking in my surroundings.

"They… uh… moved away last year. I've got the place to myself now. My brother lives here too, but he's not in much." he shrugged.

"Lucky."

"You could say that."

He led me into the living room and sat down on the sofa. I took a seat next to him and looked at him slightly awkwardly, not sure what to say now.

"How old are you?" he said.

"Sixteen. You?"

"I'm nineteen." he muttered, smiling slightly. "So, what's all this about your life being terrible then?" he said, suddenly serious.

"Well, like I said it's pretty much everything."

"What's the deal with your family?"

"My parents are divorced, my mum's remarried. I live with my dad most of the time, but he hates me 'cause I'm bi and he's homophobic. He calls me faggot and princess and stuff." I said quietly, trying not to cry again. Gerard put his arm round me. "And my step brother just makes my life hell. He's always trying to get me in trouble with my mum, and he hits me all the time. And he goes to my school and he's in most of my classes too." I muttered.

He hugged me tight. There was a faint smell of cigarettes and coffee about him, which was strangely comforting. After a minute or so he let go and studied my face closely. I looked back at him, frowning. Before I knew it he was kissing me. After the few seconds it took for me to register what was happening, I kissed him back. Our lips began to move in sync, and he bit at my bottom lip, causing me to moan softly. Within a few minutes he had me pushed down on my back on the sofa – mouths wide open so as to explore each other's mouths further. We both jumped as my phone started ringing.

"Leave it." said Gerard. I stood up, feeling quite confused and disorientated and answered my phone.

"Hello?" I muttered.

"Frank, Andy says you left the party with a boy, is this true?" my mum shouted frantically down the receiver.

"What? Yeah, but he's just a friend." I muttered, glancing at Gerard.

"So you're not planning on… you know…"

"No! For fuck's sake."

"Don't talk to me like that. I want you home right now."

"Why?"

"I don't trust you."

"Why not?"

"Frank, just get back home now!"

I sighed and hung up. "I've gotta go home." I said, shoving my phone back into my pocket. "My mum thinks I'm bent too now, and she doesn't trust me to be around a guy unsupervised at all, for any amount of time apparently." This was greeted by silence. I looked round at Gerard, who was glaring at me. "What?"

"I'm 'just a friend'?"

I stared at him confused. "Well yeah… I'm not exactly gonna tell my mum I just made out with someone who's pretty much a stranger, am I?"

"So I'm not even a friend now? I'm just a stranger?" he raised his voice, looking hurt.

"No, I just…"

"Yeah, whatever." He said angrily. "Can you go now?" I stared at him, still more confused. What had I done wrong?

"Gerard, what…?"

"Just get out!" he looked like he was about to cry.

"I'm sorry!" I said, taking a step towards him.

"Piss off." he muttered, not looking at me. I turned round and left, trying to hold back tears until I got out of the house, but a sob escaped me before I was even out of the living room. I began running down the road. The first time in years anyone tried to be nice to me, and I fuck it up. I was just confused… that was my first kiss, and it was with a guy. A guy who was three years older than me. A guy who I'd only just met.


	6. Chapter 6

I eventually got home, after getting lost a couple of times. I don't go out much so I don't know the area very well. My mum came out into the hallway, glaring at me.

"Do you want to tell me what the hell is going on with you tonight?"

"Not really."

"Frank, who were you with?"

"He's just a friend."

"What's wrong with you lately?"

"Oh, so you finally noticed my life's been hell the past two years? I thought you'd be too busy believing all the bullshit Andy says to notice."

"How am I meant to know? You hardly talk to me anymore."

"Well that might've been your first clue."

"I've got my own life too; I can't be running around after you all the time! I've got two other kids to think about."

"But you never bother with me, do you? You're just the same as dad!"

"Well you're not exactly easy to get along with!"

"Maybe it's just because you've fucked me up so much!"

"No, you fucked up by yourself Frank! You're a gay sixteen year old with no friends who's failing at school with absolutely no future! You're beyond help!"

"YEAH, ISN'T IT SURPRISING THAT I DO SHIT AT SCHOOL? EVEN WITH ALL THIS SUPPORT FROM MY LOVING MOTHER!"

"OH YEAH, YOU'RE A REALLY FUNNY GUY FRANK."

"EVEN WHEN YOU FOUND OUT I'D BEEN CUTTING MYSELF ALL YOU COULD THINK ABOUT WAS THAT I SHOULD GO TO SOME FUCKING PARTY!"

"Woah, why are we shouting?" said Andy, entering the room. "Why's the homo in trouble?"

"Thanks to you, dick." I said, punching him.

"Frank!" said my mum, grabbing my arm. I pushed her away and punched Andy again.

"Get off me you faggot!" I ignored him, continuing to kick him to the ground.

"FRANK IERO, GET THE FUCK OUT OF THIS HOUSE NOW!" mum shouted, as Andy yelled in pain. Actual pain this time.

"GLADLY!" I screamed and walked out without glancing back. When I was several streets away, I stopped. I didn't know where I was going. I didn't know where I was. I started to panic as I noticed some people a little way away from where I was stood. Drunken voices could be heard from the group. I looked frantically around for somewhere to go, and before I knew it they were two feet in front of me.

"Alright princess?" someone shouted. I recognised another homophobe from school. I didn't say anything, just walked on past them. "Oi! I was talking to you!" he grabbed the back of my shirt, forcing me to stop.

"Get off me!"

He laughed quietly, before smashing his fist into my nose. I felt blood trickle down my face. Before I even had time to react, I felt another punch in my stomach. "That's what you get for ignoring me." he hissed, before pushing me to the ground and kicking me in the chest. "And that's what you get for being a little emo faggot." He laughed and walked away. Tears began flooding down my face for the second time tonight. I wondered what would happen if I stayed here, covered in blood in the middle of the road. I half hoped someone would run me over, and just end it all. Everyone now hated me, even my mum. I didn't know if I could stand up, even if I had wanted to. I was sure at least one of my ribs had been broken. I didn't want to get up. Ever. I heard a car coming along the road, fast. I closed my eyes and braced myself, ready to end it.


	7. Chapter 7

There was a screech of brakes, a car door opening and closing and footsteps coming towards me. I didn't even bother to open my eyes. "Leave me alone." I whispered.

"Frank?" I looked up as I recognised the voice. Gerard was standing a few feet away from me, staring at me in horror. "What happened?" he asked, holding out his hand to help me up. I didn't take it, nor did I answer the question. He grabbed my wrist and pulled me up. I yelled at the stabbing pain in my chest. I did my best not to return to the cold ground. I stumbled a few steps away to Gerard's car and leant on the bonnet. "Frank, are you alright?"

"No." I muttered, shaking my head. He put an arm round me.

"You need to get to a hospital. What happened?"

"I don't. What are they gonna do to help? Clean off the blood and call my parents, that's what."

"Frank, what's wrong with you?"

"There's nothing wrong with me!" I said, glaring at him. He withdrew his arm from my shoulders.

"Is there anything I can do?"

"Yeah, get back in this car and drive off, ok?"

"Not without you." He gently pushed me towards the door for the passenger seat.

"No, Gerard." I whispered, turning round to him. "Just leave me here."

"You'll get fucking run over! You would have then if I hadn't stopped."

"Yeah, that was the idea."

There was a silence, and I looked up at him. He was staring at me. "What are you talking about?"

"I didn't want anyone to save me."

He grabbed my shoulders and pulled me round to face him, looking straight into my eyes. "Frank." I looked down at the ground, but he turned my face to look at him. "Were you trying to… kill yourself?" I nodded slowly, staring at a point just above his head. "Why?"

"Everyone hates me. Even my parents." I buried my face in my hands, determined not to cry.

"I don't hate you." he whispered, pulling my hands gently away from my face and engulfing me in a kiss that momentarily lead me to believe that everything was alright. I even forgot about the pain all over my body. Momentarily. He pulled away, and began towards his car. I followed him, getting into the passenger seat.

"Where are we going?"

"Hospital."

"What! No, please don't."

"Why not?"

"Gerard, stop. I'm not going to a hospital – I'm fine!"

"You're clearly not, Frank. Why don't you wanna go to a hospital?"

I leaned across and grabbed the front of his shirt, pulling him towards me. "Turn the fuck around." I growled into his face. The car swerved.


	8. Chapter 8

"Frank… Frankie!" I felt someone gently shaking me and Gerard's warm breath on my ear. I slowly opened my eyes. Gerard was staring at me, looking terrified. Behind him, the windscreen was smashed – the car was pretty much in ruins. "We need to get out of here!"

"W-why? What happened?"

"We crashed into a car, and then another car crashed into the back of us." he whispered.

"Oh my god, I'm so sorry... I didn't mean to make us crash... I'm sorry." I said, on the verge of tears again.

"We'll talk about it later... we just need to run _now_."

"I can't run! And we can't just leave, someone might be hurt."

"They're fine. They're both moving. Please, I'll carry you, but we need to go _now_."

"You don't need to carry me, I'll run." He climbed over to my side of the car.

"3, 2, 1…" he opened the door and we both scrambled out. Gerard picked me up and put me over his shoulder, and began running. Despite his skinny frame, he could still run fast while carrying me.

"You don't need to carry me!" I said into his ear. He didn't reply until we were five minutes away, and he stopped and put me down.

"There's no way you could've run fast enough for us to get away." he said, slightly out of breath. "Now, we're going back to mine and you're going to explain to me what the hell happened to you." He began walking down the road and I followed, but stopped after a few seconds.

"Fuck." I groaned at the pain in my chest.

"Piggyback?" said Gerard, smiling slightly. I nodded. He pulled me up onto his back and he secured his arms around my legs and I held onto his shoulders, enjoying the temporary sensation of being tall. He carried me into the house, up the stairs and into his bedroom, letting me drop onto his bed. I looked around. It was a small, dark room, with a lot of posters on the walls. It was quite messy – clothes and comics covered the floor. Gerard sat on his desk and looked at me for a moment. "So how did you end up covered in blood in the middle of the road?" I sighed, before beginning on a brief version of the night's events.

"Well, I went back home, and my mum had a go at me, and I attacked Andy and my mum told me to get out of the house, so I left, then I bumped into some people from school and this guy beat me up, I don't even know why."

"What did he do? Did he say anything?"

"He punched me in the face and said 'That's what you get for ignoring me.', then pushed me over and kicked me and…" I trailed off, not wanting to tell him what he said.

"Then what?"

"He said… 'That's what you get for being a little… emo faggot.' and walked off." I said quietly. Gerard hopped off the desk and sat beside me on the bed, putting an arm round me.

"I'll beat him up for you if you want."

I laughed quietly. "As funny as that would be, I don't think it'd help much."

"Fine, but y'know, if you change your mind, just tell me." He grinned, then pulled me into the bathroom and sat me down on the edge of the sink. He started to clean the blood off my face. "So does this happen a lot, getting beaten up?"

"Most days I get pushed about and yelled at, and I get beaten up at least once a week. That fucker just kicked me really hard."

Gerard smiled slightly. He had a sweet, slightly crooked smile that you couldn't help but smile back at. "Are you gonna be ok? Are you sure you don't wanna go to a hospital?"

"Yes, I've told you."

"Why are you so determined not to go?"

"They'll just call my parents, and they'll wanna know what happened and…" I shrugged, leaving the sentence unfinished. I wasn't even sure what I was going to say anyway. "Why did you wanna get out of the car so quickly?" I changed the subject.

"Someone would've pressed charges, and I don't have any money."

"Well, they can still find you, with the number plate or whatever."

"They can't. I don't have any insurance or anything. It's not legally mine."

I nodded, and he wiped the last of the blood off my face, lightly kissing my lips.

"Listen, I'm sorry about… crashing the car. I just got scared. I really don't like hospitals, and I definitely don't want my parents to get involved in this."

"That's ok, I'm sorry I tried to make you go… I don't use the car much and it was about to break down at any moment anyway." he shrugged

"Gerard!" a voice called from downstairs. I looked at Gerard.

"That'll be my brother." He left the bathroom, and I followed him downstairs, into the hall, where a boy was standing. You could see a vague resemblance between him and Gerard. He had a slightly thinner face and dark brown hair that flopped over one eye. "Hey Mikey. This is Frank." Gerard said, breaking the momentary silence. Mikey gave me a small smile and an awkward sort of half-wave. "You had anything to eat?"

"Yeah, I ate round Alicia's." he said, going upstairs. Gerard turned to me.

"So yeah, that's my socially awkward brother. You want some pizza?"

"Sure." I said, suddenly realising I was starving. I glanced up at the clock, to see it was midnight.

"You can stay here for as long as you want." he said, seeing my worried expression.

"Ok, thank you." I followed him into the kitchen, pulling myself up onto the worktop while he took a pizza out of the freezer and put it in the oven, before joining me. After a few minutes of conversation he kissed me, putting a hand round the back of my neck to pull me closer. I automatically responded, and slipped my tongue into his mouth. He slid off the worktop and pushed me against the wall, his hands tangled in my hair. I pulled away to take a breath, and he started kissing my neck, down to my collarbone. I moaned quietly, leaning my head back against the wall. We were interrupted by the oven timer, making us both jump. Gerard laughed quietly and went to take the pizza out, leaving me leant against the wall, staring at him. "Gerard."

"Yeah?"

"Do you wanna… be my boyfriend?" He turned round, biting his lip. My heart sank. Why the hell did I have to ask that? He was obviously going to say no. I could feel my cheeks flushing.

"I dunno, Frank… you're only sixteen."

"Then why were you kissing me?"

"Well, if we were going out, it'd be, like, more official…"

"Okay." I sighed. I don't know what I was expecting anyway.

"Aw, don't go all upset on me." he said, hugging me. He looked down at me then smiled. "Ok, I tried to make the right choice, but you're too cute." He kissed me, grinning. A smile spread across my face too, and I leant my head on his shoulder. We took the pizza upstairs to his room and I sat across his lap, eating and talking. We fell asleep like that, not bothering to get under the covers.


	9. Chapter 9

"Gerard, I'm going ou-" Mikey opened the door, but stopped as he saw us. I had my head resting in the crook of Gerard's neck, our arms wrapped around each other. I lifted my head up, looking at him. "Are you guys like… together?" he said. Gerard nodded.

"Yeah, you going round Alicia's?"

"Yep, I dunno when I'll be back."

"Alright, happy fucking!"

"You too."

He shut the door and Gerard kissed the top of my head. "I'm gonna go have a shower." He slipped out of bed, picked out some clean clothes and left the room. I got under the duvet, closing my eyes.

I slept in until midday. I rolled out from under the covers and went downstairs, to find Gerard watching TV in the living room. I sat next to him and rubbed my eyes, trying to wake myself up.

"Alright, sleeping beauty?"

"Why didn't you wake me up?"

"Well we didn't get to sleep until about two in the morning… and you look so cute when you're sleeping. I didn't wanna disturb you."

"Alright then." I giggled and sat next to him on the sofa, cuddling up to him. Gerard kissed me gently before putting his arm round me.

"Can I borrow some clothes, for now? Just a shirt and stuff, I might try and sneak back home and get some clothes later."

"Yeah, sure." He went upstairs, and I followed. "You like The Misfits?"

I nodded, and he passed me a Misfits t-shirt and some boxers, and I went to have a shower.

Gerard came with me to my dad's house, to find the car wasn't in the drive, meaning he was out. We went round the back and got in using the spare key, and I led the way up to my bedroom. Gerard looked around the messy cramped space as I shoved some clothes into a rucksack. I looked around to see him looking down at the floor. I followed his gaze to see he was staring at the blade I had dropped on Friday before I left. A few drops of blood stained the carpet. I put my bag over my shoulder and turned to the door. "Let's go."

"Frank." I looked round to see he hadn't moved. "Do you still…?"

"Well I haven't since Friday…"

He looked at me for a moment, and then pulled me into a hug. "Frank, please don't do it again." he whispered in my ear. I looked up at him – his face was full of concern. I nodded, standing on tip toes to kiss him. The fact that he cared made me resolve not to do it again. For Gerard.

We went back to Gerard's house, to find Mikey home, with who I presumed to be his girlfriend, Alicia. They were watching TV in the living room, cuddled up together like me and Gerard had been earlier. Gerard said hi to them, then we went upstairs into his room. I groaned as I flopped down on his bed. "I've got school tomorrow." Gerard sat down too.

"Why do you have to go?"

"They'll call my parents if I don't go, and then I'll have to _see_ my parents."

"Aw, alright then." He nodded, kissing the top of my head. "But if anyone gives you any shit, tell me and I'll come and teach them a lesson."

"Thanks, but I don't know if that'd help."

"It would, if there was a threat of your boyfriend beating them up, they'd be scared."

"Yeah, but the fact that I had a boyfriend would probably make it worse."

"Oh…" There was a short silence. "Frank, are you… embarrassed of me?"

"No! It's just that people at school are pretty homophobic. This whole town is, and…" I sighed. Gerard still looked upset. I turned round to him, putting one of my knees on either side of his thighs, looking directly at him. "I'm not embarrassed of you. I'll prove it to you. If you walk me to school tomorrow, I'll show you I'm proud to have you, ok?"

He smiled slightly and nodded. I smiled too and briefly caught his lips between mine before sitting back next to him on the bed. We stayed up talking until about eleven, then went to sleep, cuddled up together.

**A/N: I've had too much time on my hands today, and I've completely finished this story, so I'll put a chapter up daily from now on (there's four chapters left).  
>Also, I've uploaded a one-shot frerard that I wrote a little while ago on here, so it'd be cool if you read it ^.^<strong>


	10. Chapter 10

"Gerard, have you got any eyeliner?" I called from the bathroom, towel-drying my hair.

"Yeah, here you go." he said, entering the bathroom although I was only in my boxers, and handing me some eye pencil.

"Thanks." I said as he left, pulling on a pair of skinny jeans and a Ramones t-shirt, before turning to the mirror to outline my eyes. I went downstairs to find Gerard in the kitchen, drinking coffee and reading a comic. He was dressed in black skinnies and a Black Flag t-shirt. He looked really good.

"Shall we go?" I said, slipping on my converses. He looked up and smiled.

"Just a sec." He finished his coffee and put the cup in the sink before putting his shoes on and opening the door. "Bye Mikey, I'll be back in a little while!" he called upstairs.

"I don't care!" said Mikey. Gerard laughed.

"I guess Alicia's here then. Let's go."

We left the house and began on the way to school, hand in hand. A few people from other years gave us funny looks and a few people crossed to the other side of the street to avoid us, but no comments came until we got closer to school.

"Fags!" someone shouted from across the street. I looked up to see a group of boys laughing at us. We ignored them and carried on walking, then I saw Andy and his friends ahead of us. Just at the wrong time, Andy looked round. He laughed and stopped, telling the rest of his friends to stop too. We couldn't stop walking, so we had no choice but to walk straight towards them. I slowed down slightly, my heart thumping, but I didn't let go of Gerard's hand.

"What are you, stupid? Walking into school holding hands with your boyfriend?"

Gerard slid his hand out of mine and stepped up to Andy. He was a few inches shorter, despite being three years older. "Leave him alone." he growled, clenching his hands into fists.

"What are you gonna do, faggot?"

Gerard punched him in the stomach and he stumbled backwards, clutching his stomach. Gerard turned to me, holding out his hand. I took it and we walked past the group, who all stared at us. We only got a few yelled insults on the rest of the way to school. I stopped at the school gates and turned to him.

"Ok, I'll see you later." he said, smiling and turning round to go. I smiled too and grabbed his sleeve, pulling him gently round to face me. I leaned up and kissed him. When we broke apart, I looked round to see almost everyone was staring at us. I found I didn't care.

"Bye." I said quietly and he left, smiling. I turned in the direction of school, my heart sinking as I realised I had to spend the rest of the day in this shit hole.


	11. Chapter 11

When I got to my form, everyone looked round at me and stared. I guessed the news of me and Gerard had spread quickly. I sat on my own at the back, as usual. A few more people came in, including Andy and his friends. He glared at me and came over.

"Your boyfriend's got problems." he sneered at me.

"What did you think was gonna happen?" I shrugged, not looking at him. He grabbed the front of my shirt and slammed me against the wall, before sitting down with his friends. I closed my eyes and slid down to the floor.

"Mr Iero, find yourself a chair please." said my form tutor as she entered. I sighed and stood up, returning to my seat, wondering what lessons I had today. I pulled my timetable out of my bag to find that I had English then Maths. The bell went and I left for my English classroom, dragging my feet. The first two lessons passed in a blur of insults and having bits of screwed up paper thrown in my direction, and I went to my usual spot behind the bike sheds at break. I sat down on the grass, pulling a cigarette and a lighter out of my pocket and lighting up, careful not to make the smoke I exhaled too obvious, so no one found me. I had double gym next. I contemplated skipping, but then reminded myself of what I'd pointed out to Gerard; they'd call my parents. I left it a couple of minutes after the bell went, taking a few more drags of the cigarette before stubbing it out on the grass in front of me and leaving.

I entered the changing rooms to a few smirks and fake screams. I dumped my stuff in the corner and pretended to be looking for something in my bag until everyone had left, then got changed. Everyone looked round at me as I entered the gym. I just kept my head down. At the end of the lesson, I was first into the changing rooms and was changed in about a minute, but I then had to wait until the bell went for lunch to leave. I leant against the wall, staring into space. I jumped when the bell went and made a bee-line straight for the door, but someone stepped in front of me. His name was Mark, I used to be best friends with him. Yes, that's right, I used to have friends. I looked up at him, wondering what I'd done wrong. He punched me in the chest and I took a step back, swearing under my breath. I realised the changing rooms were empty.

"What did you say?" he growled, putting a hand round my neck.

"Nothing." I whispered. "What do you want?"

"I know why you're always the first one to get changed and the last one to leave." I stared up at him, confused.

"What?"

"It's 'cause you wanna watch the other boys get changed, isn't it?

"No!" I choked out. His grip was still tight around my neck. He pushed me onto the floor and kicked me. "Get off me!" I yelled, trying to stand up. He laughed at this. A few minutes later, he left. I heard the door slam shut and burst into tears. My lip was bleeding and my whole body ached. What the hell had I done to deserve this? I stood up and walked out of the changing rooms and down the corridor, receiving strange looks as I passed groups of people. I didn't care if the school called my parents; I wasn't going to put up with this kind of shit anymore. I continued out of the school, the tears falling down my face increasing at the comments from people. When I got out of the gates, I sped up into a run.

I hammered on the door of Gerard's house, but it was Mikey who opened it. He stared at me. "Are you alright?" he said. I shook my head.

"Wh-where's Gerard?"

"He's upstairs… what happened?"

Just at that moment, Gerard appeared at the top of the stairs. Seeing me, he hurried down the stairs. I stumbled forwards into his arms and he held me close, a half angry, half upset look on his face as Mikey disappeared into the living room. "Who was it?" he whispered. I didn't say anything, just buried my face in his shirt. I let him lead me up the stairs to his room, and I fell onto his bed, crying even harder.


	12. Chapter 12

When I calmed down enough to be able to speak, Gerard asked me what happened.

"It was after gym, and this guy said… said that the reason I was always the last one out of the changing rooms was 'cause I wanted to watch the guys… getting changed, and then he beat me up. I didn't even say anything to him, and it's not true anyway!"

"Frank, I know it's not. You don't deserve this." He said quietly into my ear, taking both of my hands in his and pulling me up off the bed, kissing me. I kissed back as he began to explore my mouth, making me weak at the knees at the sensation of our tongues brushing against each other. He pushed me backwards a few steps, until I felt the wall behind me. Our lips separated for a few moments as he took my shirt off, pulling his off too. Our mouths crashed back together, blood from the cut on my lip could be tasted in both our mouths, but I didn't care, his hands now concentrated on my belt buckle, undoing my jeans and sliding them off me. He pushed me down onto his bed, straddling me. I moaned slightly, feeling his crotch pressed against mine. I looked up at him, my heart beating at what felt like twice its normal rate.

"You ok?"

"Yeah, I… I'm just not sure… um…" I mumbled, blushing slightly

"Nervous?" The way he said it made me feel stupid. I shook my head. "Or just not sure if you wanna do this?"

"Kinda." I whispered.

"We don't have to if you don't want to." he said. I started to nod slowly, but then I felt his hands creeping under the waistband of my boxers. I groaned and closed my eyes, feeling the blood rushing to a point below my waist. I felt his lips on mine and the feeling of uncertainty was gone. Suddenly he stopped and stood up. I stared at him.

"What? You said you didn't want to." he said innocently. I sat up and grabbed the front of his shirt, pulling him back to the bed. He grinned and kissed me, the rest of our clothes quickly coming off and he straddled my hips. He reached over to the drawer of his night stand, and pulled out some lube. "You sure you wanna do this?" he said. I nodded, watching as he covered two fingers in it, then slipped one finger inside of me, quickly followed by the other, receiving a low moan from me. I bit my lip as he withdrew the fingers and covered his stiff member in it also, then dropped it onto the floor. I moaned as he slid into me, closing my eyes, my back arching. He began to move within me, sending waves of pleasure crashing through my body as he got faster and faster. "Oh… Gerard." I whispered, clenching my fists, leaving nail marks in the palms of my hands.

"You ok?" he said quietly into my ear. I nodded, letting out a moan. "I don't wanna hurt you." He leant down to kiss me, biting at my lip. He grabbed my hips to push himself further into me.

"Shit! Gerard!" I yelled. I kissed his neck, biting softly at the skin, achieving several moans from the older boy. Above our groans of pleasure, we both heard Mikey.

"Gerard?"

"Mikey piss off!" Gerard yelled, putting a hand over my mouth.

"Uh… okay…" said Mikey, and his footsteps faded. I looked back at Gerard and he grinned at me, wrapping his hand around my length and moving his hand in time with his thrusts. I threw my head back, allowing a moan to escape my lips, although Mikey was probably still nearby.

"Are you close?" he whispered. I tried to speak, but I couldn't form recognisable words. I just nodded. Thirty seconds later, I couldn't hold it in any longer.

"Shit." I choked out, digging my nails into the side of his torso, but he barely seemed to notice. I came on his chest, and seconds later I gasped as he released inside me, his whole body shaking. He collapsed down next to me. I was drawing ragged breaths, trying to even out my breathing.


	13. Chapter 13

**A/N: I know it's been a while again... I'm gonna start leaving a little longer between chapters, so I can make them longer and better quality. I know some of the chapters have been a bit disappointing so far. Anyway, I hope you enjoy this chapter, and thanks for the reviews. xo**

"How?" I said, watching as he twisted his fingers together awkwardly.

"He used to tell me everything." he said after a pause. "He'd always tell me where he was going and who he was with... not that I was worried, it was just nice that he told me, and he always would, even when he used to stay round his girlfriend's house. He seems like he's distancing himself from me."

"I'm sure he's not." I assured him, patting his shoulder gently.

"He is. He's probably sick of being the weird kid's little brother. I can't say I blame him." He shrugged, standing up again to make the coffee. I turned round to face him.

"Gerard, you're being stupid. He's nearly sixteen, he's probably just getting more independent or something... I don't know, but don't take it personally. You guys are closer than any siblings I've ever met." I said reassuringly. His shoulders slumped slightly, his back to me. I heard an almost inaudible sniff.

"We had this argument a few weeks ago." His voice was quiet. He still wasn't facing me, and was neglecting the coffees in front of him. "He told me he wished he wasn't my brother and that him and his friends always rip the shit outta me when I'm not around. He said sorry afterwards and we made up but... he still said it."

I stood up and put a hand on his shoulder. "Everyone says stupid things when they're pissed off. Mikey's never said anything bad about you to me... he's told me a lot of things about you, and none of them were even remotely bad. Don't worry about it."

"Why would he say it if it wasn't true? Why would he tell me him and his friends talk shit about me if they don't?"

"I don't know, I'm not Mikey... but have you tried talking to him about it?"

"I asked him about it before. He told me to calm the fuck down and stop acting like a married couple. He's started hanging out with the wrong kinda people... they come over and talk to him sometimes and I'm just left standing there awkwardly."

"Like who?" I said, putting an arm around his waist and rubbing my thumbs across his hip soothingly. I felt his shoulders shrug slightly.

"There's this group of kids who like, spend all their time at the skate park smoking weed."

"Yeah, I know them... you do know Mikey's smoked pot before don't you?"

"Yeah, of course I know... I just don't want Mikey to start hanging out with them. They get involved in a lot of shit with the police and I don't want that to happen to him. My parents already have one kid who's failed at life, I'm sure they don't need another one. He's a smart kid... I don't want him to waste that."

"Gerard..." I looked up at him. He sighed, looking back at me. "You're not a failure." I whispered.

"I am. What have I done with my life in seventeen years? Absolutely fuck all. I'm failing at school and I'll never do anything worthwhile."

"You've still got most of your life ahead of you, and you're still at school... no one gets shit done at school. You're smart and you're fucking amazing at drawing. Just... y'know, give it time."

Gerard smiled slightly. "Thanks." he muttered, wrapping his arms around me.

"No problem." I murmured into his shirt.

"You're adorable, you know that?"

I glared up at him and he giggled, pulling my face up to his. His lips tasted like syrup and pancakes and I licked across his bottom lip before allowing him entrance, smiling into his mouth, which tasted of coffee. I moaned quietly as he moved his hands up my back to my neck, tangling his fingers in my already messy hair, fingertips brushing against the sensitive spot on the back of my neck. He pushed me back a few steps, into the kitchen counter. His hands grabbed my hips and he lifted me up with a surprising amount of strength for someone with such a skinny frame. He lifted me up onto the counter behind me, still not breaking the kiss, meaning I was having to lean down, and he was stood on his tiptoes. He pushed my legs a little further apart, placing himself between them to get closer to me, his hands on my thighs, his thumbs lightly caressing my skin through the fabric of my pants. My neck was bent down at an awkward angle but I was too lost in Gerard's sugary lips to care. He pulled back for breath after a minute or so, breathing hard, grinning wickedly up at me, still stood between my legs, his hands still firmly gripping my thighs. I leant back against the cupboards behind me for a second, resting my neck when I felt one of Gerard's hands moving up my leg to my belt buckle. I looked back down at him, and he met my eyes, leaning up to catch my lips between his again as he began to slowly undo my belt. My jeans were starting to feel considerably tighter, but he was taking a ridiculously long amount of time to get my jeans undone. I let out a small impatient moan into his mouth, as he finally got the zipper down. He parted our lips, starting to kiss my neck and jawline instead as he pulled my pants and boxers down as much as he could. I was hard and nearly whimpering by the time he finally wrapped his fist around my dick, and I groaned as he began to gently stroke me. I let my head roll back, creating a dull thunk on the cupboard doors, my eyes fluttering shut. Gerard's lips were still on my neck, but I could feel his eyes on me. I looked down at him with half-lidded eyes, and he was looking intently at me, a small smile on his lips. I let out a loud moan as he began to speed up, his thumb brushing lightly over the head with each stroke and I rolled my hips forward into his hand. I bit my lip, leaning back against the cupboards again, slipping down on the worktop slightly. I felt like I might burst in a second, bucking up into Gerard's tight fist, choking out a groan as I came into his hand. "Shit." I panted, slumping back against the cupboards again.

**P.S. I did some editing to my one-shot Try Getting Away Now if you wanna check it out. I was reading through it the other day and I realised it needed a lot of improvements, so I made them and re-uploaded it, and I've put up another one shot too. It'd be awesome if you read them, and reviews are always appreciated.**


	14. Chapter 14

"Um, well, you know I told you my parents moved away?" I nodded. "That was kinda not true… our dad lives about ten minutes away, and he's an… alcoholic. He gets pretty violent." he muttered. I stared at him.

"Oh god, I'm sorry." I said, looking round at Mikey too.

"He's not gonna be happy if he finds out I'm gay, let alone that I have a boyfriend." He muttered.

"Ok, do you want me to go?"

"No, you've got nowhere to go, you'll just have to hide somewhere." he said, grabbing my arm and pulling me up the stairs. He opened the door of the bathroom.

"Gerard, it's ok, I'll leave. I don't wanna get you in trouble."

"It's fine."

"No, seriously."

"Alright, if you want to." he said. Two seconds later we heard the front door open and a slightly slurred angry voice yell out.

"GERARD!"

"Shit." Gerard pushed me into the bathroom. "Stay in there, lock the door and don't make a sound." he told me, before shutting the door. I did as he said and locked the door, as quietly as I could.

"IS THIS TRUE?" a voice came from just outside the door, making me jump. "YOU'VE DECIDED TO FIND YOURSELF A FUCKING BOYFRIEND?"

"No! Mikey was joking; it's just a little joke between us."

"I don't want you to even joke about that. It's disgusting. You understand me?"

"Yes." I heard Gerard whisper.

"Don't want anyone thinking my kids are fucking faggots that go around fucking other guys, ok?" There was a slight silence. "GERARD DO YOU UNDERSTAND! IT'S DISGUSTING."

"Shut up." said Gerard. There was another silence, then a smack. I heard Gerard cry out in pain.

"Why are you telling me to shut up? Are you bent?"

"Look dad, I'm gay! Ok?" Gerard yelled at him. There was another smack, and I shut my eyes tight, praying he would be ok.

"What the fuck are you talking about? Have you got a boyfriend then?"

"Yeah."

"Why aren't you dressed? Wait… have you been…?"

"No, we haven't…" Gerard lied.

"Well where is he!"

"He's not here!"

"Bullshit." I heard footsteps going into Gerard's room. I looked around the bathroom, panicking. What if he checked in here? I caught sight of myself in the mirror – I looked like sex – my eyeliner was smudged and my hair was sticking up all over the place. I suddenly heard footsteps right outside the door again. My heart started thumping and I switched off the light and jumped into the bath, pulling the shower curtain round to hide me. "Why's this locked?"

"Oh, the lock's jammed."

"I guess I'd better sort that out then." I heard the lock being tampered with.

"Dad! Don't open it!" said Gerard.

"You've just given me more reason to want to open it you little faggot." The door opened and I heard two people walk in.

**A/N: Sorry this is only a short chapter, but I felt it needed to stop there, so another cliffhanger!  
>Oh yeah, and I said there would be fourteen chapters, but there's actually one more after this.<strong>


	15. Chapter 15

"See, there's no one here."

"Yeah, sure." his dad muttered sarcastically, coming over to the bath tub. My heart was almost beating out of my chest. I shut my eyes, and seconds later the curtain was torn back. I looked up to see a tall man standing over me. He vaguely resembled Gerard, but his face was full of anger. Gerard was standing behind his dad, covering his face with his hands. "Well would you look at that, there _is_ someone in here Gerard." He grabbed the back of my hair and pulled me up out of the bath. Gerard lifted his head out of his hands, tears on his face. "Care to explain your little friend here?"

"I… it's-"

"How old is he?" he demanded.

"He's sixteen… you don't have to talk as if he's not there." he muttered, staring apologetically at me.

"So you can't find anyone your own age so you've started on little kids?" he said, hitting Gerard again.

"Stop it!" I yelled, seeing tears in Gerard eyes.

"Don't fucking tell me what to do." his dad spat at me, pushing me to the floor.

I stared up at him, terrified. He grabbed my arm and dragged me out of the room. I managed to scramble to my feet. We reached the top of the stairs and he pushed me. I stumbled a few steps before regaining my balance.

"Dad, leave him alone!" Gerard yelled. His dad ignored him and pushed me again, taking me by surprise and I fell right down to the bottom of the steps. Mikey appeared out of the kitchen and rushed to catch me just before I hit the floor.

"Get out of this house now!" their dad shouted at me, descending the stairs. I turned to the door but Mikey grabbed my arm.

"Dad, this isn't your house. Don't tell him what to do."

"No, no, I'll go." I said desperately, hoping to get away unscathed, but that didn't happen often with me. I stared at the man now standing right in front of me.

"Leave my kids alone." he snarled at me. I nodded, terrified. He opened the door and pushed me outside. I tripped and fell to the ground, smacking my head on the concrete. "You'd better run, 'cause if I see you round here again you won't be getting back home." He slammed the door. I felt really dizzy, like I was about to pass out. I couldn't run. I didn't know if I could stand up. I could hear Gerard yelling from the other side of the door, but couldn't make out what he was saying. I looked around, wondering what to do now. I was used to people being homophobic, but this… this was the most extreme reaction I'd seen. What if Gerard's dad hated him now, because of me? I put a hand to my head, which was bleeding. I began shivering. It was freezing and, well, I was wearing a pair of pyjama shorts. The door opened, making me jump. I looked round to see Gerard in tears, standing in the doorway. He helped me up and pulled me into a hug. I clung onto him. His dad glared at us. "Gerard, I swear-"

"Frank, I love you." Gerard blurted out, cutting across his dad. I stared at him. I was still dizzy, and felt pretty confused, but I knew that was I was about to say was true.

"I love you too." I whispered back, and kissed him on the cheek, forgetting that his dad was there. He started forward and tried to pull Gerard round to face him, but Gerard didn't move, didn't let go of me.

"Dad, I'm 19, I can make my own choices." Gerard muttered, not looking at him.

"No, you can make your own choices when you learn to make the right choice."

Gerard turned to look at him, letting go of me. "Who says this is the wrong choice?"

"Come on, even _you're _not that stupid." he laughed slightly. Gerard took a step towards him.

"Gerard, don't." I whispered to him.

"What have you got against me having a boyfriend?"

"The fact that you're a guy too. I've told you about this."

"Yes dad, you've told me again and again how sick you think it is, but that's just because you're so narrow-minded like the rest of this fucking place that you can't accept it." said Gerard angrily. His dad hit him. "Can you just go now?" he said calmly, as if his dad hadn't even touched him.

"Sure, but if you want someone to blame for any of this, you know who to go to." he pointed his thumb towards Mikey, who stared at him confused.

"What?"

"It's not his fault; it's your fault that you have such a problem with this."

"What the fuck did I do?" said Mikey. His dad turned to him, grabbing the front of his shirt

"You were stupid enough to tell me."

"DAD, GET OFF HIM!"

Their dad turned round, smiled slightly at the panic he had caused to arise on his oldest son's face and left, slamming the door. Gerard fell onto his knees and covered his face in his hands and began sobbing. Me and Mikey exchanged worried looks, before I knelt down next to him. Mikey looked down at his brother for a moment then went quietly upstairs.

"Gerard…" I said quietly. "Gerard, look at me." He raised his tearstained face. "It's ok, he's gone…"

"But… he… are you ok?"

"I'm fine." I said, wiping away the tears on his face. He looked at me, running a hand through his hair.

"Sorry."

"What've you got to be sorry for?"

"For the fact my dad just beat you up and pushed you down the stairs, for being stupid and acting like this… Where's Mikey?"

"He's gone upstairs."

"Ok, I just… well, you and Mikey are all I've got now."

"You're all I've got, Gerard." I whispered, hugging him.


End file.
